Last night, after showering and starting to get ready for bed, I pulled out my journal from 2007. That was a tough year for us as Jarrett had battled the "C" word and while he was doing better, and getting through treatments okay, we found ourselves in the middle of a very hard time. It was a time filled with uncertainty, with fear and with a dedication to rely upon our faith and that God had a greater plan we needed to rely upon. Reading through the journals I found a pattern at the end of each one. One that ended with a moment of gratitude and a pledge to trust God and the plan he has placed us on.
It was clear in those days and in the months following the completion of Jarrett's treatments, that the one desire in our hearts was to start a family. Each journal talked about what was happening in our lives and how we were, but it also included at least one sentence asking for God to answer our prayers and bring a child or baby into our lives.
I look back now on those moments and sometimes have a hard time remembering what life was like before the kids, before the family, before the full minivan and loud, chaotic home. Of the many prayers I sent to God in those days, I remember begging and pleading that if he would only make me a mom, I would never not be grateful for the gifts of getting to take care of and raise a child.
The last year of this pandemic has been one of the hardest years we have faced. Yes there have been hard times before... Jarrett's diagnosis and losing Noah that will always be at the top of our list, but honestly the pandemic and being home for now 13 months has taken a toll as well. While some of our children have thrived in online school and getting to do everything virtually that has not been the case for all. In the middle of trying to protect our family and keep us healthy, we have seen the struggles of mental health challenges impact our lives in ways we never could have imagined.
While respecting our child's privacy and what they have been through, it is safe to say that I have learned so much. Mental health doesn't just impact the individual suffering but everyone in the family and as a result we all have faced the challenges of this hard illness. While we remained almost completely free of COVID, the hardship of mental health was a toll of great burden.
As we navigated new waters and tried our best to find the appropriate resources and support, we also found ourselves facing another surprise. I'll let the pictures speak for its self.
Yes that's right, our family is growing again. In fact as I type this, I am laying in the hospital bed, connected to Pitocin getting ready to evict new newest bundle of joy. To say this baby was a surprise would be an understatement, and it's taken us the last almost 9 months to comprehend that we will get to be the parents to six, yes a half a dozen, children. I think back to that journal from 2007 when I begged God to let me become a mom. I guess my prayers were answered and then some right?
We arrived at the hospital at 6:00 am and our wonderful doctor, Dr. Alperin was there to greet us. He helped us to schedule induction but he had a family emergency come up he had to attend to. The fact that he came to the hospital just to wish us well and talk to us before returning to his own family, meant a lot.
Jarrett and I joke that this baby is our greatest surprise of 2020, when we thought nothing could top COVID and the direction that we would all have to stay at home for a year plus... working from home, schooling from home and taking care of little ones from home day after day after day. I guess that's maybe why this baby came to be.
24 hours later:
After a whirlwind labor, that scared us and was hard on both of us, we are so grateful that our little miracle boy is here. He was born 24 hours ago at this minute. While the delivery was relatively fast, it was scary and he had a rough start but now he is doing better and we can't imagine our world without him.
With that being said, we are so happy to share our newest family member.
Until next time,
Angie
