Wordless Wedensday... Mother's Day gifts

This past weekend I was the lucky recipients of many lovely gifts.  I shared the story about it earlier but thought it was time to show some photos...

First Isabelle's gift her teachers at school helped her make...

The funny thing about this gift was that earlier in the week last week I confessed to Jarrett I was a tiny bit sad that I wouldn't get the traditional "school made" gift from Isabelle for Mother's day because she is only going part time.  Except to my surprise on Monday when I went to pick her up, her teacher said, "I bet you thought you weren't going to get one of these since we did it later in the week when she wasn't here.  But Isabelle and I talked and decided you still needed a gift so we just did it today."  I have to admit it made my day and seeing her cute little (or big) foot, is super cute!


And then there were Gabriel's lovely gifts including his special note of love for me...

I think his card is so cute because of his proclamation that I'm the best coker (cooker) in the world.  It makes me laugh to read this because tells me this at least once or twice a week as we have dinner.  This kid truly appreciates every meal as he is always the first one to thank me for what ever meal we are eating and he reminds his brother to say thank you also.  How lucky am I to have him as a son?

And then there was Michael's gift.  Again so precious and nice.

His drawing so cute and as I looked at it I said, that is really nice Michael.  Thank you.  At which point he said, "Mom turn it over there is more on the back about you..."  And so I did, and this is where the wordless Wednesday comes into play.  As I read through each of the nice statements about myself, we got to the one about how much my mom weighs....

Michael said, "Mom, my teacher made me change it, to a 1 instead of a 2.  Mom, I know I was right and that you weigh 215 pounds so even though it says a 115 just know, I really mean for it to say 215 okay?"

I just smiled and said, "Thanks Michael, just don't guess how much your girlfriends weigh when you get bigger okay?" 

Got to love the things kids say right?

Until next time,
Angie

When did she learn all this?

It seems Isabelle is at a stage where every single day her knowledge and vocabulary grow.  It seems each day she says a new word, accomplishes a new feat and impresses us more with her bubbly and daring personality. 

Just today Gabriel asked her, "Isabelle whats my name?" and she responded with a Gabil in a way we surprisingly looked at each other with the look of did she really say what we thought she did?'  And when Gabriel said, "Do you know my name?"  She nodded her head up and down, her newest way to answer yes. 

And then there are the words she says, drink, Jack, cracker, tree, Moma, Dada, keys, Tigger, Pooh, fan, and ball.

Just yesterday we were reading books when I realized she knew more words than I even thought she did.

Here's a quick video of what she showed me yesterday...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ty0T9KvocgE

No longer a little baby, she's a moving, running, not-stop talker who is communicating very actively and having conversations.  Most days I ask myself, how can this be.  And even though the baby stage was so much fun, this stage is just as wonderful.

Until next time,
angie

Mother's Day

While earlier this week we celebrated our three year anniversary of being a family, today we got to celebrate again.  I woke up this morning late (6:20 a.m.) , thanks to Jarrett letting me "sleep in" and after that he let me take 30 minutes to myself and go for a walk.  The boys begged and pleaded to go with me saying, "Mom- PLEASE CAN I GO RUNNING WITH YOU, I PROMISE I'LL KEEP UP .  and so I gave in and let them come with me (knowing this would mean I'd barely make it to the end of the block without the boys wanting to turn back).  So along we went while Dad took Isabelle and Jack for a walk and yes it was 6:30 in the morning.

As Michael, Gabriel and I took off, the boys were full steam ahead, running as fast as they could, until Gabriel noticed I wasn't "racing" and decided to come back and walk with me so I wouldn't feel bad I was so slow.  Talking together, it wasn't 20 seconds later when I saw Michael 30 steps ahead,  bent in half, huffing and puffing.  He said, "Mom, can we turn around and go home?"  We seriously weren't even to the end of the block.  So we tracked down dad and sent the boys to go with him, which meant Mom got some quiet time, which as selfish as it sounds, was warmly welcomed. 

As I returned home and walked through the door, my family greeted me by singing Happy Mothers Day and immediately demanded that I open the slue of handmade gifts and cards waiting on the table.  There was the handmade drawing by Isabelle which Jarrett translated to show it was a picture of Pooh and Tigger sitting by a tree and a hill.  And for Gabriel, he made me two handmade cards, plus a flower shaped necklace made of out of clay and a painted flower pot with flowers in it.  Just one of the flowers happen to be holding a picture of him.  And then there were Michael's gifts that he had so patiently been holding onto for 5 days under his bed.  Everyday for the last week he'd wake up and ask, "Mom, is today Mother's Day?"  And when I'd say no he'd ask, "Well than how many more days do I have to wait to give you your presents?"  I'd answer and then he's say, "Mom, you are going to love it, your going to have so many presents it will be like your birthday."  Perhaps the most excited to give the gifts of all the kids, he presented me with a handmade necklace with six beads (even though they were only suppose to have 2, he said I got 6 because I was the bestest mom and the art teacher said it was okay) and then a hand print of his own with a cute saying on it.  He asked me to read it out loud and as I read it, I found myself choking up.  It talked about how they are little now but soon they will be grown and the fingerprints that are on every thing now that I complain about will one day be gone as they'll all be grown.  Again, makes me sad to think about.  The gifts were lovely and will be cherished gifts for ever. 

After the grand gift opening, which seemed like Christmas morning, we had a nice family breakfast where Jarrett ran off to the store to get me some of the needed ingredients we didn't have at home.  At  his return he made a comment that the store was filled with dad's, all helping each other find certain things at the store, obviously for their mom/wives waiting at home. 

After church Jarrett had to go to work so that meant the kids and I were home to enjoy a simple and quiet Mother's Day together.  We read books, we played Star Wars with light sabers, hide and seek and we even watched a rodeo show on TV.  The boys learned a lot about rodeos (we've never watched one before) and LOVED the names of the bulls, shouting the seconds that each rider was able to stay on.  Something new and yet so simple, we enjoyed just being together.  In a way I felt bad, lazy almost, that I didn't have something grand planned, that we didn't venture out, that I didn't leave the house after church.  And yet, while we didn't have the grandest of mother's day plans, it was wonderful. 

Simple.

Loving.

Genuine

Pure Quality Time

And while I didn't take pictures to recap the day, I did my best to just be in the moment.  There came a part in the day when I couldn't resist and had to record the moment.  After playing Star Wars Gabriel asked if we could dance.  Yes, Dance.

Maybe it is an Ellen thing.  Maybe it was just a spontaneous request or maybe that was just another way for us to celebrate us getting to be together. 

So you know what we did....

we danced.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-poUiRTrkAM


And this mom recorded it, because, as Michael's poem reminded me, some day they'll be grown and celebrating with their own wives and families and I'll want to look back.  Because these are some truly special times.

Happy Mother's Day to all the mom's out there. 

Until next time,
Angie

PS:  And to those who are praying and waiting to become a mom, I send prayers for patience, hope and peace.  I remember so badly wanting to be a mom and how much this holiday hurt.  And while my words can't take away the feelings that may be experienced today, I hope that you can look forward to the future and believe in a bigger plan.  However one becomes a mom, through birthing or through adoption, when that day happens, please trust me when I say, you heart will heal and overflow with love.  It is a love you've never experienced before and a love that will make this difficult process all worth it.  Thinking of those who are future mom's on this special day too.

A world standing still...

As a child, running through the Iowa grass with the wind blowing my hair all around, I often remember thinking how I couldn’t wait to grow up.  I couldn’t wait to be an adult; to have a job, to have a family to have, it all.

And now as an adult, I look back on my childhood with so much happiness, innocence and joy that I find myself wondering why I had ever wished it away.

In a strange, glass-half-empty approach to life, I look up the local obituaries from my home town.  I guess it is something as a young child, I observed all the adults doing.  I remember listening to my grandparents, my parents and friends gathering around a table and discussing the latest town news… “Did you hear Gladis Smith passed yesterday?  “No but on the Oelwein KOEL AM radio obituary announcements this morning, I heard so and so died.”  And so now as an adult I guess it’s just one of things I absorbed through osmosis, or at least that’s who I’m going to blame.

And that leads me to Marianne Mashek.

Who might that be you ask.  She’s one, one of many people whose faces I remember and whose image represents to me a life, a life in a world that should still be standing still.  Do you know what I mean? Am I making any sense?  I fear no.   Have you ever visited a place that you had gone to many years before, and upon returning you were surprised to see that it had changed, it seemed different, maybe smaller,  maybe older and just not the same way you remember?  That is who Marianne Mashek is to me. 

Growing up with parents who ran a ballroom, there were many a weekends spent at the “hall” helping clear off tables, wash dishes and serve cake.  Being there to help, also meant that we were able to celebrate many a celebrations with friends and community members from all areas of Northeast Iowa.  With the ballroom a part of my entire childhood, there were many parties for the community to have, from graduations, to weddings, to anniversaries and even the annual Memorial Day veterans tribute which brought out the entire town.  With all those celebrations in a close knit community, it was no coincidence strangers became familiar faces and in many cases friends.  Even to a little girl, who grew a bit taller with each passing year and whose responsibilities adapted from just setting up chairs, to helping dry dishes, to eventually serving cake. 

You know most people in their lives strive to leave a mark, to impact those around us positively and to make the world better for at least one person.  There’s that old saying that you never know how many lives you’ve impacted in your life and as I think about it, it’s true.  I haven’t seen Marianne Mashek in probably close to 15 years and yet to me, she is still that friendly, white-haired, 60ish lady, that Lawler staple, that would turn her head to the side, bend over slightly (to be closer to my level) and she’s say, “Well, hi Angie…. How are you?”  Did she have an impact in my life?  Yes.  Did she ever realize it?  I am confident, no.  And although it seems she was just a friendly face with a kind persona, she did impact me.  She is a part of the memory of my youth, which I cherish and look back fondly on.

That’s it.  In my mind, life as I remember it should be stopped, where no one is aging, where the celebrations continue and the life remembered still continues day after day.  Think Groundhog’s day movie, on loop.  And it in those moments, when I pull up the obituaries and I see the news of a face I recognize but one that has aged some, and learned they have left this world, that I’m reminded.

 Life does not stop.  The memories of my youth are not on repeat.  And in what seems a glimmer of a second, time is slipping away.

So now that I’m wholly depressed, I remind myself to think of the today.  I have been blessed with three little people who are in the middle of that magical stage of life called childhood.  And although I will never get that time back in my life, I do get to be a part of their childhood, of their magical memory making years and it makes me challenged to help them make the most of it.   Am I helping to create the ever so perfect memories of childhood for my three little people?  Am I giving them the experiences I so cherish now?  What will be there “go-to” moment that they think about in 30 so years from now? 

Although reading the obituaries may seem like a pessimist action in an already negative-news society, in a strange way it is good for me.  Not only does it allow me to reflect on what a wonderful childhood I had and the many wonderful acquaintances I shared it with; it also reminds me of just how delicate life is.  How to be thankful for the family members still in my life, to be considerate of those family memories suffering from their loved-one’s loss.  And mostly, it reminds me to be thankful for what I have today.  Although I miss being a little girl, running through the long-soft-blades of grass in rural Iowa, I’m thankful to have had that time and to be where I am today.  For if I wasn’t where I am now, I wouldn’t get to experience the joy, the happiness and the innocence in the eyes of my three little ones today.

Until next time,

angie

A horse walks into a bar...

And the bartender says, "Why the long face?

So now that I have your attention, this post has nothing to do with a horse, a bar or a bartender.　 It’s really just my attempt to win you back with humor.　

My blogging attempts these past few weeks have been weak, actually non-existent would be more accurate and although each night I tell myself to go update the blog, the reality is, I just can’t seem to peel myself off the couch.　 And when I finally do roll from there, the calling of my bed is much more enticing.

To be truthfully honest and open, this past month has been a bit chaotic for us.　 We’ve been struck with the spring flu (What’s the spring flu you ask? My coined term for getting the flu out of normal flu season), not once but twice!!!!　 And in between, there was a trip to the ER (for me this time), where I learned the doctors had found a mass and that surgery was unavoidable.　 With my surgery 2 weeks ago now, we are trying to adjust back to normal and praying for a day when we all feel well.

In some ways, it is just comical and all one can do is laugh. Two days before my surgery Isabelle got the flu. The day after I had surgery and when I felt like I had been hit by a MAC truck, Jarrett came down with the flu.　 Then, almost like clockwork the very next day, my phone rang and while I lay on the couch counting down the minutes til my next percocet, I listened as the school nurse told me to come pick up Michael, he was throwing up and had a fever.　 The flu had struck its next victim.　 And through the house it went.　 Again, one can only laugh.　 (Oh and thank God for parents:　 my mom and Jarrett’s parents were life-savers for us).　　 Finally, just this  pastweekend we thought we were turning a corner until Isabelle woke up Sunday with a 104.2 degree fever.　 I really don’t like spending my Sunday evenings in Urgent Care.　 Seriously, getting us all healthy at once shouldn’t be this difficult.

Sometimes it seems things all hit and once.　 Even when one is on their "A" game, it can be hard to get everything done one needs to.   However, I’ve learned not to take feeling well for granted because trying to do everything I need to do, while feeling crappy; well that’s just so much worse.　 And yet, while I complain and grumble about feeling yucky, I still have to be thankful that this is only temporary.　 When I finally got into bed last night, well past my normal bedtime, I turned on the TV to unwind for a minute or two. 　 I saw a commercial for a fundraiser Phoenix Children’s Hospital is doing for terminally ill children.　 And like getting hit in the head with a ton of bricks, I told myself to keep things in perspective.　 For those children, some may never know what it is like to feel better again.

And so while it may take us another week or two, or even a month to get everyone healthy again, I am hopeful that that day is nearer than it was yesterday. So be thankful for the day, I will, because there is always something to smile about, to laugh about and to be thankful for. Even if its as tiny as a corny joke about a horse in a bar.

Until next time,

Angie

Wordless Wednesday... 3 years ago today

Three years ago today, the boys came to live with us (and never left).

 I remember feeling nervous and speechless as we met them and brought them to see our house, their forever home for the first time. 

And today I reflect back and wonder, how can it already be three years?  Some days it feels like that day should be yesterday and other days it feels like we’ve been a family forever.

Until next time,

Angie

Wordless Wednesday: 47 month pregnancy

The other day Jarrett told me about a conversation he and Gabriel had had.

I’m not even sure what the topic of conversation was ,but it had something to do about an event in the early 2000’s.

I guess Gabriel, in deep discussion said, “Dad, I was around in 2002 but I waited to come out (as in be born) until 2005.”

Unsure how to respond, I guess Jarrett just said.  “Oh”

Guess that is one LONG pregnancy for his birth mom.  Maybe I should be thankful I didn’t carry him.

Until next time,

angie