I've talked about my grandpa before and here I am tonight talking about him again. Some of my earliest, best memories are of times spent with my grandpa and grandma They are two of the most incredible people I've ever met. Sweethearts in their teens, separated by a world war for 2 years, countless nights of worry they must have endured and yet, they were destined to be together. For 60 years their love story unfolded... six children, 14 grandchildren and many great grandchildren.
What an incredible life. And when I think of what my grandpa has been through in his 93 years I cry to think of what life could be like without him. I know this past year has been probably one of his hardest yet. My grandpa has worked hard his entire life and I don't think he ever officially retired, it wasn't until his last fall that he stopped going to work. A model for hard work, faith and determination through and through. He has always been my hero.
In the hardest of times he called upon his faith, his trust in God and the values he was taught as a young boy to guide him through. He respected his mother and cared for him until he had to say goodbye. And then he showed the same love, respect and care for my grandma, the love of his life, until he had to say goodbye too. I had never seen my grandpa cry until he lost my grandma. It was clear in the 60 years they were together their hearts had connected in so many strings, it was clear his heart had sustained many wounds. And yet through heartache, he gave and continues to give thanks. He believes he will see his loved ones again and dreams of the days to dance again with my grandma. You should have seen them dance, it was almost like they became one when their hands joined and the music started. They could dance like no other. I am sure it brings him a smile to think of what awaits.
I give thanks for all the times I've shared with my grandpa, so many to recount and yet how come I selfishly feel like I still want more. No matter what I know I will never be ready to say goodbye. I will never stop longing to have more. He has been a part of my life from the beginning and I can't imagine a life without him. A life when he isn't the first person I call in the morning and the person I long to talk to several times throughout the day. When he calls me "Brown Eyes" or "Angela Kay", "Dear" or "Bright Eyes" When he tells me he loves me and how I've brightened up his day just by making a simple call to say hi.
Each time we conclude our call I tell him I love him and he tells me the same. He thanks me for being one of the greatest joys of his life and I tell him I owe him more thanks. It's moments like this that start off my day each day and remind me of why I admire and love him so much. He isn't one to complain, but always gives thanks for what he has. And on the days when the hardships are harder than others, he says, "I suppose it comes with the territory" and then says, "but I have a lot to be thankful for." If only I could be more like him.
Of all the times my grandpa and I have spent, he has always made me feel special, like I was loved and that he believed in me in anything I dreamed to do. From my first day of preschool when he dropped me off and said, I had such a grip around his neck not wanting to let go, to taking me to school, coming to all my track meets no matter how rainy or cold, and dropping me off at college. Most people don't get to have that many moments with their grandparents, I know how lucky I have been.
I give great thanks for the moments my grandpa has been able to share with my family, and how he knows my children. My grandmother passed before I became a mom and I always longed for her to meet my kids. The fact that my grandpa got to meet and know my kids is a gift in itself. We shared Christmas together, we went fishing, we read stories, we watched movies, we went to baseball games, we enjoyed grandpa's running egg breakfasts. Oh yes we had many great times. I will always cherish the Christmas's we spent together, Jack will too. He and grandpa were buddies during the day when the boys were at school and we were at work. Oh to be able to relive those days.
The best eggs anyone in the world could make.
We went to football games together.
Michael and Grandpa shared snacks and picked out "the yummiest ones"
Even though he only got to go to the 8th grade, my grandpa is one of the smartest men I know. He didn't mind reading Sponge Bob to Gabriel
Or telling Michael all about where the wrinkles on his hands came from.
Oh and the fishing trips on the vacations to Iowa.....
A dream I always had, a reality we got to share.
And then the girls came around. Grandpa's lap was the perfect place for Isabelle to nap. A warm, comfy place, rocked to sleep so peacefully.
Love this picture! Love my grandpa's smile.
On Christmas morning, Grandpa was always surprised that Santa had brought him presents too. He said, "I don't know if I deserve any presents, but I'm pretty thankful for Santa." And then he'd wink at me.
Love this picture of Grandpa and our family just a few Chrstmas's ago.
And this picture, is of Grandpa, me and Noah. One of the last weeks before my water broke.
This picture is one of my favorites. I can still remember that night like it was yesterday. The house was warmed by the glow of all the Christmas tree lights. The house was quiet as the kids were asleep and Jack was asleep at the foot of Grandpa's chair. I quickly snuck my phone out and snapped this and thought, I'm going to cherish this picture forever. Such peace.
This picture also makes me think of the many Christmas he had before, when he was a boy, when he was first married, when he and Grandma had their oldest children, when they had six kids at home and then their families grew, how they had the best Christmas's when we were kids and how Christmas at grandma and grandpa's were the best. It is partially because of the way they made Christmas so special that I go so overboard with Christmas now. I am sure he would say all the years went by too quickly.
This picture a reminder that life will go too quickly.
Reading more books. A whole pile, he'd sit and read for as long as they'd listen. Patience and kindness, the best role model.
Even Madelyn agreed with what Isabelle felt as a baby. Grandpa's lap was comfy and warm.
The last time my grandpa got to visit us out here in Arizona. (Never mind Isabelle desperately needed a bang cut). He always make it such a point to try to come when he could, even when I knew it caused him pain in his hips to ride that far and that traveling was harder and harder. For us he'd come. Again he'd always say we were worth it.
As I sit here tonight, I pray for more times with my grandpa and my heart aches to think our times are limited. I guess that is the case about life in general and with anyone we love. I pray for more times but more than that I pray for comfort, for peace and that my grandpa feels the way he has made me feel my entire life. That he feels loved more than anything, that he is the most important thing to us and that I will always give thanks for the moments we had.
Grandpa will always be my greatest hero, the one I looked up to everyday of my life. That he always knows how much I love him and that he continues to guide me all the days of my life.
I end every call each morning with the same words,
I'll call you later Grandpa but until then I'll be thinking of you always. I love you.
Yes, there will never be enough time. I will always want more.
Until then,
Angie
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