VBS 2021

 This week has been Vacation Bible School at our church for the girls and they have LOVED it.  I think we've all come to appreciate and relish in the times we get to spend with others and have glimpses to what our life was like pre-covid.  

Each morning this week the girls have gone to VBS where they've learned about God, sang songs, done crafts, played games, had snacks and had fun.  It's been so good for them.  

Tonight we got to go for a recap of the week where they gave us a glimpse into what their mornings had looked like, and we got to hear the music, walk through the stations they participated in each day and well, have more fun.  

It was magical getting to see how excited the girls were and how their eyes lit up.  We weren't the only ones to notice, Jennings immediately sensed their excitement and joined in.  This was also the boy who sat as quiet and still as a church mouse last Sunday in church, when we went back in person for the first time since February 2020 (minus the one private ceremony we got to attend for the boy's confirmation in September of 2020).  

This time, Jennings in church was a bit different as you can see from the video.  It was such a fun evening.

Here are a few pictures too.  My heart swells with how watchful Madelyn is over Jennings.  Don't get me wrong, she can tease and make him mad faster than anyone else, and she does it regularly, but to see her love on him and be so proud of him (she kept telling everyone that he was her baby brother Jennings), it makes me smile. 

Here we are outside (yes in the 118 degree heat), learning about the mountain and valley game they played.  Jennings wanted to play too, but was unsure at first what to do.

Soon Madelyn realized he was unsure and went right up to him to reassure him and share love. (Melt my heart)

Look at his face, he's so happy.

Meanwhile Isabelle (in the pink shorts and blue/purple shirt) is ready to tackle anyone going after her mountain. :-)

Then the leader of the games told the kids to raise their hands.  Again Madelyn was being so reassuring for Jennings.

He again felt confident enough to join in too!

Soon all the kids left the field so the leader could explain another game,  Jennings was still facing her so he didn't see the other kids leave.  Madelyn had left too, but then realizing her brother was still out there, went back out to get him...

And together they walked back off.  Look at how embarrassed Jennings was, but he was still smiling.

Got this makes my heart so happy.  I hope they remain the closest of friends as they get older and that they continue to have each other's backs.

So grateful for a safe and fun VBS this year.  Looking forward to more activities like this!

Until next time,

Angie

 Dear Noah,

Happy early birthday buddy.  I can't believe in just a few hours you will be turning 6.  In some ways when I think back to those moments we spent together it doesn't seem that long ago, and yet I look at life today and can't believe how much has happened and how much has changed. 

Six years ago tonight, I remember laying in that hospital bed knowing somethings were changing, even before Kristal, our nurse mentioned she was concerned about you and thought it was time you came.  I remember being really warm that day and that I felt you very low.  I also remember feeling the contractions more consistently than what had been happening the days prior.  I think maybe I was in denial and tried to push it out of my mind.  I wanted you to stay inside for as long as we could.  But you were destined to come and on the early morning hours of June 13th you made your arrival.  Boy did you make me happy to know you survived labor and while it was so scary to see how tiny you were and how they rushed you off to the NICU, I was proud from the very first moment... that I was your momma.

Noah, I'll never understand in my lifetime why your story went the way it did.  I long to know you and to watch you grow up, but as the years pass by I find myself more at peace knowing you are okay, waiting for us and watching over. I so appreciate the signs you still send on extra stressful days (you and God know there has been plenty of them this past year) and just like this past Wednesday when life presented us with another stressor, I turned on my computer to join a meeting and there you were... a rainbow on the screen, a reminder to let go and let God guide us through each moment. 

In the past six years I've wondered so much what your daily activities are like.  Do you play with the other babies and children that have to leave their parents too early too?  Do you spend time with our grandparents? I sure hope you tell them hi for me.  Do you bounce along the clouds, laughing and smiling?  I wonder what it's like.  

Noah, I'm so grateful for the time we got, although selfishly I wanted more, I'm thankful I got them in the first place.  Tonight at the dinner table we talk about that tomorrow is your birthday and that you would be 6.  Isabelle said, "Mom, I wish Noah was here." and I said, you know Isabelle we all wish Noah would have lived but that wasn't the way it was supposed to go and Madelyn is here, and we are so thankful she is here.  To which Madelyn busted out the song, "Heaven is a place on Earth" and we all laughed.  She always makes us laugh and really was a true rainbow baby in the sense she restored our hope and faith that after losing you we could still have better days.

And here we go to sleep tonight with two more little guys in addition that bring us so much joy, love and happiness.  Thank you and God for sending them to be in our family too.  

Noah, tomorrow we are going back to the place where you spent your earthly time, Banner Desert hospital and we will gift items in your memory.  We hope the families who are given the gifts find moments of hope, of happiness and that they pass along the kindness, just like we were given so much when you were born.  Noah, although the time passes and life goes on, you will always be a part of our lives and we celebrate you.  

Although I don't get to hug or kiss you or help you blow out your birthday candles, I will always do my best to honor you and your life.  I hope tomorrow in Heaven is an extra special day for you.  Maybe you'll go fishing with Grandpa Ray or be swooned upon by your grandma's.  What ever the case, I wish you a very happy birthday, little buddy.  I'll send my love to you in the morning as I look up into the sky and search for the rainbows you send us.

Happy 6th birthday Noah!

Love you always,

Mom 

Preschool and Middle School Graduation

 This week the school year wrapped up and we celebrated both Michael and Madelyn's milestones of finishing middle school and preschool.

Michael went to school virtually all year and he thrived.  This was probably his best year yet.  We are so proud as he finished his middle school career with a 4.0 and no missing assignments.  Michael is a bright kid and has always gotten decent grades but the missing assignment piece is a super big improvement.  He seemed to really like the online environment and I'm not going to lie, it was really nice to have him around the house.  We shared many lunch 1/2 hours together this past year.  

Michael's 8th grade promotion was virtual as well so I only have the one picture submitted to celebrate his achievement.  Michael is passionate these days about making money and is motivated to achieve many things in his future.  This summer he is back in Iowa working with family at the business, learning the ropes and the value of hard work.  While we miss seeing him, we are excited he is getting this opportunity as well.   

The other graduate in the house is Madelyn who completed pre-school.  She started in October as the pandemic was raging in our state and as nervous as we were about her being in person and contracting the Corona Virus, she was a trooper and did everything she could to keep her and our family safe.  She diligently wore a mask all day from 8 am-2:30 pm and she would shower the moment she got home.  At school she'd wash her hands many times a day and keep her 6 feet away.  As new as this way of living was for us, she adapted better than any of us, and it was just the way things were at her new school. 

She had incredible teachers, loving and so encouraging and Madelyn learned a lot.  She is ready for kindergarten and as her teachers said, "She is a true gift."  

Madelyn's ceremony was also virtual which we recorded but then on the final day of pick up, the families were invited to come take a picture and so we did.  

In one of the many mom fails I have, I was carrying multiple things up with me to the place where we picked her up, and with it being summer time here, the temperatures are HOT.  In my attempt to carry multiple things I tucked my cell phone into my armpit.  When we got home and I looked at my pictures I realized that my sweaty armpit made the camera lens dirty so all the pictures we have of her special moment appear as if we are in a sweaty sauna... nope just the remnants of my sweaty armpit.  Sorry Madelyn, another reminder your momma isn't perfect but I try. :-)

Either way, we are so proud of you too Madelyn.  We are excited to see what next year brings.

Even big sister was able to celebrate and come out of school to take a picture with us.

Promise we weren't in a sauna from our necks up... just a mom who didn't think to wipe the camera clean.

Maybe this filter will help?  Not really.

Congrats Maddie

Dad and I are so proud of you.

Madelyn with her teacher Ms. Emily.

As we jump into summer, and start trying to make the most of the 6 plus weeks the kids have off before they go back to school, we are thankful for making it through this year.  Earlier this week I panicked as I didn't have our full summer schedule and the kids' summer school work planned out.  Then I thought about what we've all been through this past year and thought... you know for 6 weeks, we will do what we can but this should be a summer of fun.  

So that's what we are going to try to do.  Each day we will try something new, different and fun... if it's as simple as introducing the kids to Disney short films, trying new ice cream treats, teaching them how to make cream cheese mints (yum) and going for daily walks.  

This has been a year we've all done our best to just "survive", so a little work mixed in with a lot of fun, is just what the doctor or "tired mom" ordered.

Congrats to all the kids on getting through another year.  We are proud of you all.  And to Michael and Madelyn kudos on another milestone checked off.  We love you all.

Until next time,

Angie

Our exciting days...

I don't think motherhood is all that glamorous.  Maybe it's just me, but these days if I brush my teeth for the day before lunch, I consider that a success.  Having a baby causes your body to change in ways I had NO idea about, and this time around the healing is much more extensive than the past babies.  In addition to still not feeling myself, I spend most of my days walking around the house just picking up messes.  

Mostly from this guy who goes from one thing to the next as fast as I can blink... thankfully he's easy to find as he leaves a trail of destruction as he goes. 

Our living room looks like this daily and I promise I put it back every night.

Just working on rearranging our shower... no biggie

Or throwing an entire bag of powdered sugar on the counter and floor

Or using dot markers on everything he can including his hair, the walls, the chairs and the floors.  Thank goodness its all washable.

And when I'm not picking up Jennings "activities", I find myself cleaning up Finns...

  

Thankfully I had just finished my lunch.

Oh the joys right!

Some days it gets overwhelming and I feel like no matter how quick I am to pick up one thing I can't catch up.  I look around and wish my house was all tidy. And then there is moments like this one...

I was home with the little ones and it was nap time.  Jennings wanted to be held by me and at the same time Finn was hungry.  Thankfully I was able to arrange to have both of them on me at the same time.  As you can see I couldn't do much else but just hold them and rock.  Soon Finn feel asleep and Jennings wouldn't let me move an inch.  Soon he fell asleep too.

I was super tired myself, and it actually felt good to just have to sit and hold them.  I even shut my eyes for a few minutes and soon the minutes turned into over an hour and soon I realized I had to go to the bathroom! 

And then the minutes dragged on and no matter how I tried to wiggle and get out of the chair, I couldn't escape Jennings grip.  I tried to distract myself, I tried to find a show on my phone to watch.  

After I while I took this picture and sent it to a friend that said, "Help, I'm stuck under babies and have to pee!"  You know the saying "don't wake a sleeping baby..."  Well I don't think it was written by a mom who had to go!  Determined, I eventually got myself out of the chair and was able to keep Jennings asleep.

Speaking of sleep... I better get started on this paper for school, or I'm never going to get to sleep.

Until next time,

Angie

 

Moments to cherish...

The weeks are flying by and Finn is growing like crazy.  He's changing looks, filling out and such a cuddle bug.  

I took him for his 1 month appointment and he was one ounce shy of weighing 12 lbs.  He had grown 3 1/2 inches in one month and I kid you not, he rolled over for the first time, right in front of the doctor.  Right after I told her that when we do tummy time it seems like he's going to roll over.  She replied, "well not yet, babies don't roll over until around 3 or 4 months"  and almost as if he was going to prove her wrong, the then rolled over.  

On April 29, just a week after his birth, Finn's umbilical cord fell off.  While the signal he can then start getting baths, (which he hates) it is always a mixed feeling moment for me.  That was the cord that kept us connected all those months.  The sign that my body did what it was supposed to in nurturing him, growing him and providing all he needed when he was inside.  

In these early pictures, specifically the one below, you can tell his jaundice was bad in this photo... the whites of his eyes are well, not white but yellow.

I love this little picture of him...and how you can see his footprints through his pajamas.

Finn has always liked tummy time, he lays on his belly and doesn't whine or even cry.  He lays there and raises his head to look around.  He has been so strong from day one.

Speaking of sleep in that photo above.... as you can see from the photo below... mom and dad aren't getting a lot of sleep.

But these baby cuddles, all worth it.

Madelyn and Jennings have found a new friendship lately and have really enjoyed playing together.

While Madelyn colors the box, Jennings decided to color himself and the box.

I love the scrunchie faces newborns make... here are some of the ones that make me smile. 

Finn has grown so much, I decided to take a picture next to Mickey Mouse as a comparison. 

That yawn.... I feel you Finn, I feel the same.

One of my favorite pajamas that I have Finn wear almost every night is our little cookie monster jammies.  They are from Caden Lane and I LOVE them.  They are silky soft and the tie at the bottom makes it so easy to change him in the middle of the night when I'm so tired.  He seems to like it too as it provides a swaddle style feel that probably reminds him of the womb.

Madelyn loves him and checks on him many times a day.

I love this outfit and look on him.  He reminds me of an old soul... wise and peaceful.

Again look at how strong his neck is.  He holds himself up like a trooper.

Finn's eyes are getting darker and it seems pretty clear to us he is going to have brown eyes.  

Here is another cute outfit and he looks so tiny to me. 

Jennings adores Finn and calls him "Baby him" although it is clear he's trying to say "Finn".  It's so cute. 

Here's a picture of Finn's first bath on April 29th.  He did NOT like it. Finn is definitely a shower boy.  I think he likes the sound of the water falling from the shower head.  

Belle and Finn already have quite the bond and while I've been begging Finn to smile at me for weeks, all Belle has to do is put him in her arms, and the smiles come easily.  He sighs in comfort when placed in her arms, and she is a natural it seems.

I'm a big fan of personalized stuff, so really like this blanket.

"nap time" is cherished around here, except by Jennings.  

The smiles come easily.

This was mother's day and while I was missing the two big boys, it was still a very fun day with these lovies.

Melt my heart...

She's such a good big sister.

Love this picture.  My two little boys.  I am looking forward to seeing how much fun they have together.  No need to say it... I think they are going to keep me on my toes.

Finn's look of "um what are we doigng now mom!"

It's going to be interesting to see who Finn looks like.  While Jennings is pretty much his daddy's twin, we haven't decided who Finn looks like yet.

As the weeks fly by, I'm doing my best to soak up the moments.  We are so thankful for all of our children, and Finn most definitely completes us.

Until next time,

Angie