Day 6: A good day

As nervous as I was to walk out the door of my house today and attempt to balance it all, I sit in bed tonight and give thanks... today was a good day, a good good day.

I woke up early and headed into the hospital where I found Noah having some difficulty regulating his oxygen levels.  He seemed to be irritated and the nurse shared with me that he had been needing regular suctioning.  After Justina, his nurse and the respiratory therapist suctioned him his level rebounded.  I texted Jarrett a few minutes before I had to leave the hospital and asked him to make sure he came as soon as he could, as I was nervous leaving his side. the other main development this morning when I arrived was that Noah's Bilirubin light had been turned off.  This was the light that helped him from becoming jaundice.  The doctors thought that his skin was looking good enough that the light could be turned off.  When I looked at my baby it was the first time his googles had been off for good and I got to see a really good look of his face.  He looked so peaceful after they had suctioned him and he was resting peacefully as far as I could tell.  They also now have a large blanket they cover his "home" with, to provide extra darkness and mimic the womb.  So far, Noah LOVES it!

Before leaving,  I prayed for Noah to have a good day and that God watch over him all the time but especially when I was at work.

I arrived back at work today, and the response was just how I said it was going to be last night... wonderful.  I received warm embrace after embrace with encouraging words of "I'm praying for you all", "I think he's beautiful", "Every thing's going to work out just fine, he'll grow big just like his older brothers."  Their hugs, their support, it helped me get through the day.  Along with the text messages, the notes of encouragement, the emails from others.... I could feel the love and it helped me to put a smile on my face and gain confidence in being able to handle it all... just maybe I can do this.

After work today I raced to the hospital to be able to participate in afternoon care.  I was able to change Noah, and help provide reassurance in my hands.  While they decided to hold off on food for another day, we were excited to hear he pooped again.  It was another sign, the milk is moving through and just maybe he'll be ready for some more milk tomorrow.

Noah seemed very satisfied again when I arrived.  I checked in with his nurse to ask how he was and she said he had been having a good day.  He was able to maintain his heart rate, CO2 levels as well as his oxygen levels.  She said in other news they put in a pick line today as they are wanting to remove the lines from his umbilical cord.  They put the line in is right arm and it looks HUGE compared to his tiny arm.  The nurse said this line can stay in for up to a month, possibly longer.  I was just glad to hear they wouldn't have to poke him for at least a little while.

After helping with Noah's care, the nurse called one of Noah's neonatalogists  to come talk with me. Dr. Hamburg came in and went onto explain to me several things about Noah's progress, where things stand and what they are looking at going forward.  I was very impressed Dr. Hamburg.  She explained to me that this weekend or early next week, they will do an ultrasound of his head to check for any brain bleeds.  It can be very common among preemies and especially those born so early.  Dr. Hamburg said she is encouraged by what she sees and doesn't believe Noah's demonstrating any of the symptoms to indicate a bleed, but will know for sure once the ultrasound is done.  She said the first 72 hours are when he was at the greatest risk for bleeds, but that they can still happen.  We pray for a good scan when ever it happens.

She also told me that Noah's skin is looking good so they are starting to wean him off the humidity.  Down from 75%, when we left today, the humidity levels were less than 50%.

Another area they were very happy about what his blood pressure.  Noah has been able to maintain a good blood pressure level from very early on, (within the first few days).  Dr. Hamburg said she was really happy about this as most babies at his age, have to be on medicine to help them with that.  She said they have never had to give him medicine for his blood pressure.

She also shared with me additional information about their goals for Noah.  She said, after the first 14 days, the main things they worry about are a) him getting an infection, and b)feeding issues.  She said these are often the two biggest complications they have in their preemies, but that they are very proactive if they suspect infection they will give antibiotics.  One of the most common places they get infection are in the lungs.  I pray feverishly that Noah does not get infection.  

Secondly the issue they tend to see if feeding issues.  She said, Noah's main goal in the NICU is to grow and we have a delicate balance of  feeding him enough without feeding him too much.  She said there will be times they have to start and stop feeding and while it seems scary to us to not feed him, she said it is better to underfeed than feed too much.  I trust her completely.

The other thing regarding food and getting bigger is weight.  She said, all babies lose weight after they are born. She continued, "Often our littlest babies loose the most."  I told her we were worried about Noah's big weight loss and she said, our goal is to have him back to his birth weight, or close to that by day 14."  She explained, "I don't think we are going to get exactly there, but I think we will get close.   Speaking of weight, tonight they weighed Noah and he gained again.  He now officially weighs 1 pound 5 ounces, up an ounce.  This time I did a victory dance.

In this picture they are weighing Noah.  They have a scale in his bed, and what they do is take a reading, hold him up, calibrate the scale and then place him back down on the bed to get his weight.  Also from this picture, one can get a good indication of just how small he is.  He could probably fit in the palm of  Dad's hand.  

Dr. Hamburg also said that she would invite us to be in the NICU on Thursday mornings from 9-11 as that is when the entire team of doctors in charge of Noah's care do rounds together.  Dr. Hamburg said it is a perfect time for us to hear updates on Noah, the direction of his care and to hear their weekly (not just daily like we've been getting) goals for what they want to see Noah doing in the next 7 days.  I thanked her for sharing the information and told her we'd make sure we have someone there every week.

Another step we will face in the coming days is Noah getting a blood transfusion.  She said that with all the lab orders they have and the many times they prick him to draw blood, he will probably need to get transfused.  She said it is very common and the fact that he didn't need a transfusion so far was very encouraging.  "Many babies have to get one in the first week, its great that he didn't."

Overall she said for him being almost a week old, they are encouraged by what they see in Noah.  They say he's feisty and in their words, "that's the best kind of preemie"  We pray that determination never leaves him.

After talking to Dr. Hamburg I felt the most reassured, informed of the future and optimistic I've felt in the past 12 days.  While I'm optimistic, I can't help but hear the voice of every other professional saying, "Don't let your good days get you too high and don't let the bad days let you get too low."  With that mantra playing over and over in my mind, I tell myself to be cautiously optimistic.  Tonight I feel thankful for the fact it was a great day.

Not only was I welcomed back to work in warm open arms, but Noah had a good day.  I believe all the prayers people have been sending are really working, so if I may be so direct, please please please keep them coming.

It's been a day to give thanks for and to hold onto when the difficult days are staring us down.

Noah, you did such a great job today.  Mommy is so happy to see you've gained some weight and are doing so well on the oscillator.  Keep up the good work little buddy, today your doctor gave mommy some indication on when I'll get to wrap my arms around you and hold you close to my chest.  If you keep things up, on gaining weight and keeping those oxygen levels up, it might be only a couple of weeks away before I can place you onto my chest and snuggle oh so softly with you.   Mommy is so excited for that moment, I hope to dream about it nightly until it becomes our reality.  I love you precious Noah.  Good night and see you in the morning.

Until next time,
Angie