Today has been a great day. Nothing too exciting or spectacular has happened, but it has been a very good day. This morning we got up early, 5:15 a.m. and I decided to spend some quality time snuggling with Gabriel since Michael was still asleep. I've been secretly second-guessing myself, maybe that is just something moms do, but I find myself running through the days events over and over in my mind. I always want to make sure I'm giving them equal attention, reassurance and praise. I feel like we are doing a good job with that but sometimes I wonder if I need to do it more. Since Michael is just 3 and needs more "mommy help" I find myself attending to his needs regularly. Given that Gabriel is 4 1/2, I give him more independence and watch in amazement as he does things on his own. But lately, in the evenings, I find myself wondering if I could do more to make Gabriel know I love him equally as much as his younger brother. And so, it was for that reason that I decided to spend some quality Gabriel/Mom time this morning.
The boys seem to like it when I rub their backs right before nap time. I remember my mom always doing that for me before I would go to sleep, and it is a memory I cherish now as an adult. I now feel like it is my turn to help create lasting memories these boys can cherish when they become adults. Gabriel and Michael are still at that age where they like to cuddle and it is apparent they want to always be close to both Jarrett and I. This morning, as I snuggled with Gabriel and rubbed his back, I could almost feel him letting down his guard. Gabriel is a very mature 4 1/2 year old, he has had to step up and be his little brother's protector for a long time. This morning when I was rubbing his back, it was one of the first times I think Gabriel realized that he no longer has to take on the burden of carrying for or watching out for someone else. Also, I think he realized he now gets to be the recipient of someone carrying for him too. Right before Michael woke up, Gabriel sighed, rolled over and said, "I love you so much Mommy." That was the start of our great day.
There were many other highlights today but I'll just conclude with another brief story about how our day ended. We sing a lot of songs these days, kids songs that is. A couple of those songs we sing are from the Lion King, a classic Disney movie. The boys haven't seen this movie but they love the song or the words, "I just can't wait to be king!" and "Kunamatada". We've been talking about it and thanks to my aunt Anita for letting us borrow her good old VHS tape we were able to enjoy a family movie night tonight. As we were watching the movie, it was clear the boys were attentively following along, and then out of the blue they would turn towards me, sitting the farthest away from the TV, and either move closer to me to make sure we were touching or they would come and give me a hug. I know they do these things with Jarrett too. At one point, it was Gabriel, Michael and me in a row and all of a sudden Michael grabbed my hand moved it over to be in between him and Gabriel and then the both of them held my hand. I guess the power of human touch is important for everyone, no matter how young or old.
It is so true, everyday these little boys amaze me. I can't wait to see what tomorrow will bring.
Good night,
Angie
Such sweet boys - can't wait to see them again.
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