But I was actually excited for today because it was my orientation for my nursing program and while it was only on zoom, I was so excited to learn more. I've been working for this day for what feels like forever. While it made me nervous and wonder if I can balance everything (they stressed, this is a vigorous program and we don't recommend you work- so you're saying my plan to still work and raise 5 kids ages 14-almost 1 isn't the smartest idea?), I am oh so very excited.
At one point during the orientation they talked about Florence Nightingale and how she embodied the qualities we should strive to possess. They talked about how today was the lighting of our lamp for our nursing careers and they asked us to take the pledge that is so coveted in the nursing profession. Here it is:
As I read it, I pictured myself at a patient's bedside and then I recounted all the times I was the patient and how many incredible nurses took care of me or my children. What an honor I view it to be to hopefully stand among the same ranks as them. Tonight I watched this video from our college that reinforces the incredible job of nursing and I am truly excited. It is going to be a very hard, challenging and life altering experience, I am nervous, but I can't wait to someday do what I've wanted to "be" since I was 18.
Classes start in less than 5 days, I better get ready!
As the day went on, it was a day filled with work. Jarrett tried to take a few hours off today so I got to work on cleaning out my work email! The kid were fighting more than normal today and my honey do list didn't get as far as I hoped. This afternoon I took the kids swimming, they needed to burn off energy and while it is normally a time where they scream, yell, and wrestle, today I told them we were having a quiet (meditation) like swim (mainly because dad was on a work call and couldn't have it be loud). Anyway I told them to swim and stay as quiet as they could and much to my shock they actually did it for 23 minutes. Hey, I wasn't sure if they could even do it for 1 so I was happy.
As the day went on,I found myself thinking about my hopeful future as a nurse. I've spent many hours brainstorming what type of nursing I was to do, what department and of course from my experiences I'm definitely leaning toward the NICU, Labor and Delivery and antepartum. It just so happened today a person I follow on social media went into labor and because of COVID-19 decided to have her baby at home. All day she was in the back of my mind and after several hours of no update I began to be concerned for her. Thank goodness everything went well and she ended up having a almost 9 1/2 pound baby at home without pain meds (incredible). Watching her the last few months and seeing the joy in welcoming a new baby has been fun, it makes me already want another one. Maybe that's another reason why God didn't allow us to get pregnant right away... I'm afraid we'd have 10 kids. I just love babies. Anyway... I look at Jennings and cherish even more every single day we have with him as our baby. Tonight as I was sitting down to work again, I happened to see an interview with a couple who had also made the decision to give birth at home just a few weeks ago because their hospital wasn't letting partners into the delivery room for fear of the virus. As a result they decided to do a home birth. Unfortunately as the baby was being born the baby got stuck and ended up sustaining severe brain damage because of oxygen deprivation. Their son ended up passing away and they were sharing how they donated their baby's organs. In listening to their story my heart broke. I feel like my heart is so deeply affected by these stories as I know how hard the pain is for those going through loss.
When I listen to these stories and dream about my future goals as a nurse, I hope that my experience will allow me to have more compassion and be able to provide better care. I worry that I won't be able to be as strong as the nurses who stood by my side when Noah was dying and who comforted me without tears, but with more love and compassion than I could hope for. I pray my compassion is abundant but I'm not sure I won't be that nurse that cries alongside families when they cry happy tears or sob in sadness. Maybe they will teach us that too.
So many thoughts racing through my head tonight.
What ever the case I am ready for this next challenge. I will try to remind myself I don't have to tackle everything in one day but a little progress each day leads to where I want to be in the long road.
I'll close tonight with a few pictures of the craziness that is our home.
Madelyn spent some time drawing a lot of nice pictures.... can you tell how hard she worked?
This guy is always on the go now. I can't believe he will be 10 months in 2 days.
He is really loving getting to play with all his siblings. That is another good thing about this time. The kids have really bonded with one another and with a few to choose to play with they don't get too tired of one another.
Isabelle playing with Jennings and Jack. Jack's not to sure about Jennings but when he wakes up he loves the attention Isabelle gives him.
Another picture of Madelyn's super pretty drawing!
Man do I love the snuggles this guy gives me. Here he had just gotten up from his nap. He is SUCH a happy baby.
LOVE HIM!
And while I give Jennings a bath, these two crazies are wrestling and playing with dad's electric razor trying to shave off each other's hair. Always something around this place!
Maybe I just need to remember that babies turn into crazy teenagers when I get baby fever.
Until next time,
Angie
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